


what I deserved

by whitherwaywill



Series: one chapter wonders [17]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Gen, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-03
Updated: 2020-09-03
Packaged: 2021-03-06 21:48:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,304
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26275918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whitherwaywill/pseuds/whitherwaywill
Summary: When Pansy was twelve, she was determined to become the next Lady Malfoy. Now, she's survived a war, and her life is so different from how she thought it would be - yet so much better.
Relationships: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter, Pansy Parkinson/Charlie Weasley
Series: one chapter wonders [17]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1689838
Comments: 2
Kudos: 45





	what I deserved

Draco Malfoy's pale blond hair sends a shock down her spine, and for a moment, she can't breathe.

Pansy never, ever expected to see him here, of all places. The Burrow is full of light, and warmth, and happiness, and Draco Malfoy teems with darkness, coldness, and sorrow… she can't make the two congruent in her mind. She can't believe her eyes.

"Pansy." Her date touches her hand, and Pansy turns to face him.

"Yes?"

"Hey," Charlie says, squeezing her hand. His blue eyes crinkle up in the corners. "Just a few more hours, and we're headed back to Romania."

Pansy rolls her eyes with a laugh. "I don't hate your family that much, Charles… not anymore."

He grins. "Well, then, I'm feeling stifled. And I miss Norbert."

"Norbert?" Pansy raised an eyebrow, trailing a hand up his sleeve to where she knows he's hiding a fresh scar, courtesy of Norbert himself.

"Hey, hey." Charlie pokes her. "He's getting affectionate in his old age."

Pansy snorts, rolling her eyes. "Sure, affectionate – is that what we're calling it?"

"Oi, Charlie!" Ron runs up. "Parkinson," he says civilly, nodding to Pansy.

"Weasley," Charlie corrects him with a proud smile, brandishing Pansy's hand and putting her wedding ring on full display.

Ron groans. "Whatever. We're playing quidditch in the back, want to join? Unless you want Mum to rope you into helping out."

"Sure, I'll be there in a minute."

They begin to walk around the house, dodging ankle-biters and grown Weasleys alike. Charlie links her arm in his, and throws his head back, shaking out his ginger mane and breathing in the crisp air. Pansy smiles.

She sees that pale blond head again out of the corner of her eye, and her heart leaps into her throat. It's a sickening feeling. "Charlie – Charlie, is that Draco Malfoy?"

The grin slips off his face, he studies her carefully. "Shite, Pansy, I forgot to tell you, I'm so sorry…"

"Forgot to tell me what?"

"He's dating Harry," Charlie says, getting it all out in a rush. "Yeah, uh… they're cohabiting, and they're raising Teddy together."

"Oh," Pansy breathes.

It aches, how well Charlie knows her. He observes her, and she knows he's worrying. He's remembering all the little tidbits of her childhood she's shared with him.

"Do you want to avoid him? Or, I don't know, I can get him alone and scare him a little -"

"No, Charlie, no, that's fine. Thank you." She pecks him on the mouth, just as Ron and Ginny begin hollering for Charlie. "I love you."

"Oh, good," Charlie huffs, his grin returning. "I was afraid I'd mucked it up, there."

Pansy grimaces. "My fault for not reading the gossip rags."

"Or my mum's letters," he says, guiding her to the backyard with a hand on the small of her back. "Those are both better and worse than the rags."

The game is well underway within minutes, everyone having been waiting on Charlie. Pansy settles in at the sidelines, exchanging an affable nod with Granger, who's got her nose buried in a book. Pansy can tell she's not fully focused, though, by the way she winces every time it seems like one of the quidditch players is about to collide with another.

Pansy watches and cheers for Charlie, but she can see that blond head glinting out of the corner of her eye, and she hates how remembering him makes her feel.

Watching Draco and Harry snipe at each other midair, Pansy can remember the arrogant girl she was - the Slytherin who knew that one day, by hook or by crook, she would snag Draco Malfoy and become the lady of Malfoy Manor.

She _deserved_ that, at the very least, she thought. She had endured her mother's etiquette lessons, her father's stern words, the incredible isolation that came with learning to be a lady - she deserved her rich prince, her happy ending.

The very thought makes her feel claustrophobic, makes her want to call Charlie out of the air and ask him to hold her, just hold her, until that terrifying idea of what might have been fades away.

If there hadn't been a war, Pansy might've been Draco's empty, pretty society wife, and they both would have been miserable.

Pansy can remember the broken, brittle woman she had been after the war – after _give them Harry Potter –_ a woman who no one would serve, who got spit on in the street. She remembered banding together with Draco, and trying to make it work.

They thought they deserved each other.

Draco deserved an outcast, a woman society wouldn't touch with a ten foot pole. Pansy deserved a man who couldn't overcome his demons long enough to support her when she faced hers.

"You don't deserve this, Pansy," Draco had said, his voice hoarse, when he had ended it. "You don't deserve _me."_

Once upon a time, he would have accompanied that phrase with a sneer, his nose held high in the air. Pansy remembered how shocked she was at this broken shell of a man, who sounded sincere as he denounced himself as worthless.

Now, as she watches him snatch the snitch out of the air before Harry Potter's nose, she can't see even a hint of that defeated man he had been.

The teams cycle down from the sky, cheering and jeering at one another. Pansy has no idea who's won, but everyone is happy, and grinning, and she feels like she'll explode if she soaks up any more of their glee.

Draco catches a glimpse of her out of the corner of his eye, and does a double take, even though he must have known she was there.

Pansy thinks that he must be surprised, too – that he must see how she has changed.

She had run off to Romania, deciding to put her NEWT in Care of Magical Creatures to use. She had run away, and accidentally found her home – found a life she was happy in, a life she wanted.

She had found Charlie, and somehow, Draco had stumbled across Harry Potter.

They were both whole, and healed, and inexplicably, indescribably happy.

She is so, so happy that Draco turned her away.

Pansy catches Draco's eye from across the yard, and he freezes, his team's celebration continuing around him.

They don't need to have it out in a private room, don't need hugs and apologies and 'I'm so happy you're happy, really'. They were doomed from the start, but Pansy wouldn't give up her memories for the world – and she knows that Draco wouldn't, either.

Draco juts his chin in a nod, and Pansy returns it. Harry comes up behind Draco, a squirming Teddy in his arms. Draco swings Teddy onto his shoulders with the ease of practice. The giggling child's features immediately shift to match Draco's.

Pansy's shoulders relax as she feels Charlie come up behind her. He wraps his arms around her waist, and she leans back into him.

She feels so warm, so happy, in a way that she never thought she would - in a way she never expected the Burrow, of all places, to make her feel.

Once upon a time, Pansy had thought she deserved Draco Malfoy, for all the wrong reasons.

This bubble of happiness was too precious to jeopardize. She wanted to live in it forever.

Closing her eyes, she leaned back against Charlie, feeling his broad shoulders bracketing hers.

"You good?" She could hear the smile in his voice, the bright twinkle in his eye.

Pansy felt light, in a way she hadn't felt in a long, long time, and she turned a wide smile on him.

"I've never been better," she said, taking a deep breath. "I'm just – I am _so_ glad I didn't get what I thought I deserved."

**Author's Note:**

> I may or may not be writing a drarry raising Teddy fic.


End file.
